CSA

CSA Calculator

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Scourge of the CSA and all round comical complaints website CSAhell.com has just added a CSA calculator to their site. Using the incredibly complicated rules laid down by the CSA (rules even they don’t seem to understand) the calculator provides an accurate idea of what you can be expected to pay when the CSA comes calling. You can also use it to check that the CSA is in fact asking for the correct amount from you.

Go here and use the calculator, or fill in the form below for an instant quote on what the CSA should be asking you for.

CSA Payment Calculator

CSAhell.com

General

Reasons to be your own boss

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In the current economic climate, with redundancies and closures happening in sectors throughout the country, many people are taking it upon themselves to set up in business for themselves. Whether it’s for the freedom, the promise of untold riches or just the ability to get into work late and not have to face the boss’ wrath, many people are choosing to be their own boss. But what is the reality of working for yourself in the current climate? Is it all puppies and sugar cubes? (That made sense in my head).

Let’s look at the fiction and the reality of anyone would want to become their own boss.

The fiction:

  • Money: You can pay yourself whatever you want
  • Freedom: You don’t have to go into work if you don’t want to
  • Boss: You don’t have a boss
  • Stupidity: You don’t have suffer anyone else’s stupid business decisions
  • Holidays: You can take holidays whenever and wherever you want

The reality:

  • Money: You pay yourself only what you can afford, and that usually isn’t much – sometimes nothing at all
  • Freedom: You don’t have to go into work, no, but then nothing will get done and you’ll have no business to speak of
  • Boss: You have a boss. It’s you, and if you slack off you have to deal with yourself, wondering why you can’t pay the bills this month or your clients are unhappy work hasn’t been done
  • Stupidity: The only stupid decisions you have to suffer are your own, so the buck stops with you
  • Holidays: Holidays? Holidays??? Are you serious? You can’t take holidays – who will cover for you?

Do you still want to be your own boss? The reality of working for yourself isn’t quite as exciting and rewarding as the notion may first seem, but (and there is a but) it does offer you the sense of freedom and achievement you just can’t get by working for someone else. The opportunities and potential of becoming your own boss are also unlimited (as the risks, of course) so you succeed or fail depending on your own ability and dedication.

What are you waiting for?

Videos

Video of a car almost crashing into me

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Last week, on my way to work, I almost had a crash. This, of course, is nothing new. However this time I managed to capture the close shave on video, thanks to my new dash cam, a digital recorder that is attached to the windscreen of my car.

Over the years one of these would have come in very handy, especially when some idiot reversed into me and then lied about it. Sadly I have only just got the camera, but it’s already starting to pay off. This particular incident happened when some moron decided to swerve across the road in front of me, rather than wait for me to pass. As you can see from the video, and the slow-mo, it was very, very close.

I’ll be recording all of my car journies from now on, so expect a few more of these in due time.

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Home Delivery Network

Delivery Man Throws Monitor Over Fence

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For once we have a story of a delivery man throwing a parcel over a fence, and it’s NOT Home Delivery Network. This time it’s FedEx, and the delivery drive in question lobs a Panasonic monitor over a fence right in front of the CCTV. Smart chap.

The video was added to YouTube on the 19th by the intended recipient of the monitor, and in two days it has attracted almost 2.5 million views and has gone viral. FedEx must be so proud of their driver. They couldn’t have paid for this type of publicity. Watch the video and marvel at the ineptitude and the ‘just couldn’t give a f*ck’ attitude of the driver.

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Cardiff Devils, StuckOn

Flintshire Freeze sponsorship

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Several years ago I was involved with the Cardiff Devils Ice Hockey team when I built their website (designed by the very talented JP of Still Brilliant). When I built the website for the Devils I attended games every week, and even presented a man of the match award to net minder Phil Osaer in a Devils’ 4-3 win.

This weekend I presented another man of the match award at an ice hockey game, this time at the Flintshire Freeze in North Wales. The Freeze had just beaten the Fife Flyers 15-6 at the Deeside Ice Rink, and I was there in my capacity as Technical Director at StuckOn, as StuckOn is a sponsor of the Flintshire Freeze.

During the game we received our sponsor’s shirt, which sports our logo on the arm, and then following the game I presented the man of the match award for both teams.

When I arrived at the rink however I didn’t realise I’d be doing the man of the match, and I was asked if we had a banner with our company branding (for the photograph) which, sadly, I didn’t. This set me thinking that perhaps we should have had some sort of branding for the photo, such as a banner or perhaps T-shirts (like the MrDaz one I had printed a few years ago) or maybe personalised polo shirts with our logo on them. This would have looked great in the pictures but, unfortunately, you’re stuck with my grinning mug (incidentally wearing the exact same coat that I wore when I did the Cardiff Devils presentation – I need to go shopping).

Still, the game was great, the Freeze annihilated the Flyers and there was a great fight in the third period (all you want from an ice hockey game really).

General

Beer glasses: the bachelor’s glassware

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As someone who has had to buy items for a new home, on more than one occasion, it’s always amazed me that the many ‘home starter’ kits you get in Argos and Sainsbury’s etc seem to contain glassware. Glassware isn’t something I have ever been short of, and have more beer glasses in my home than most pubs – as I’m sure most guys my age do.

While it is true my glass collection doesn’t necessarily match, with different branded beer glasses all sat next to each other in various cupboards and cabinets, I never have the problem of drinking a beverage out of the wrong glass – something that I have to put up with in many pubs and bars. For example, I find there’s nothing worse than drinking Peroni in a regular beer glass. If you’re paying £3-£5 for a Peroni (as it can cost in some bars) then you’ll want the entire drinking experiencing that the money affords. In my house this isn’t an issue. Equally, when you’re drinking a Guinness (as I do regularly) you’ll want a Guinness glass to complete the experience. Some pubs have the audacity to serve Guinness in a non branded glass or, worse, in a Carlsberg glass (or some such inferior lager glass).

This annoys me, as a great many things do, so I’ve made sure this doesn’t happen in my house. Whatever the lager or beer, I have a glass available. Where did I get these beer glasses? The same place every guy gets his glassware, and it wasn’t from Sainsbury’s or Argos.

If, by some chance, I have a beer for which I don’t have a glass I can cover it by using one of my Beer Festive beer glasses, which were obtained legally at the Stockport Beer Festival… happy times.

CSA, Internet

Security leak at the CSA, or intelligence leak at the source?

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One of the many websites that I administer is the very popular (or unpopular, depending on your stance) advice website CSAhelll.com. The website features daily stories from parents, both mothers and fathers, who are tearing their hair out due to the incompetencies, errors and bullying tactics at the hands of the Child Support Agency.

One post the site had recently was particularly funny because the woman who posted it came back a few days later, after receiving advice and comments to her post, wondering how her story had wound up on the website in the first place. This woman’s story (which I won’t link to) was sent in to the website by the aforementioned woman using the contact form on the website, yet she was dumbfounded as to how we received her information and were able to post it.

Had there been some sort of security leak at the CSA itself, you may ask? This wouldn’t have been uncommon, seeing as their data is hardly secure anyway. They once posted a woman’s bank details to me by mistake, after printing them out and leaving them on the printer for some idiot to pick up and shove in a letter bound for my address. They have also famously lost data, and had staff sacked for accessing adult websites and material online using supposedly secure computers; their information security is basically a mess, something which I personally told their head of security, Bernard Devaney, when I last spoke to him in reference to the CSA staff member who tried to coerce fathers into killing themselves via Facebook. He agreed, although couldn’t go into detail.

However, this time the error wasn’t the agency’s, not that they couldn’t do without recruiting a few more people to information security jobs anyway. No, this error was the fault of the woman who rather stupidly pasted her entire story into the CSAhell.com website thinking she was contacting the CSA and, even when she returned to the website to retrieve her feedback didn’t remember being there in the first place.

No wonder her life’s in a mess.

General

No Audio in Adobe Premiere when importing from a Sony Handycam

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Having just switched to a new PC I faced the same problem that bugged me for months with my laptop (before I found a fix and then lost it again) so, as much for me as for anyone else, here is the solution to not getting any audio tracks in Adobe Premiere CS3 when importing files from a Sony Handycam.

My particular model Handycam is a DCR-SR36 – although I believe the issue may affect other Sony Handycam models as well. The problem is that when you take video files from the camera into Premiere, you’re left with video only – and no audio track. The fix, as it happens, is quite a simple one and requires you to download this dll file (right click and save target) and copy it into the root folder of your Adobe Premiere.

Before you do, I take no responsibility for anything that goes wrong – but it worked fine for me on both computers for which I’ve tried it.

If you restart Premiere, you should find your video files now have sound.

On a related issue you may find that Adobe Premiere isn’t playing any sound at all through your speakers, even though you now have an audio track in the timeline. This can be fixed by navigating to: Edit –> Preferences –> Audio Hardware –> ASIO Settings

Then ensure that each device is checked (as they’re not all checked by default, so you may end up with no sound).

This is the double headed problem I just faced today (and again last year, but didn’t make a note of the solution) so the next time I get stuck on it, I’ll know where to go. Hopefully it’ll help someone else too.

So much anger, so little time