It’s fair to say I’ve had some pretty awful experiences with businesses over the years. Carphone Warehouse were outright liars and I caught them out faking customer reviews, BT have been a shower of shite forever, Direct Line allowed insurance fraud and cost me thousands and, as for YODEL, don’t even get me started on those imbeciles.

JD Sports, however, have contrived to take the crown for worst customer service. While some people at BT do attempt to help you, and when you eventually get high enough at Carphone Warehouse you get results, every single person at JD Sports was utterly useless and, as it turned out, simply made matters worse.

The story started when I placed an order for a Wales shirt on Sunday June 12th. The shirt was to have one of the players names printed on the back (I won’t even pretend you don’t know which one) and the number. I paid the offer price of a pound for next-day delivery, so was realistically expecting the shirt Tuesday – as you can’t really count Sundays.

However, later than evening I received an email saying my order had been shipped. Really? That was fast. Way to go JD Sports. I might actually get it on Monday. I was very impressed at this stage.

Just a quick update … your order JD88542857 has been despatched and will be with you shortly.

That email was sent at 22:54 on June 12th. The order was placed at 15:43 that afternoon.

Monday came and went with no delivery. No worries, I didn’t really expect it the next day. Tuesday arrived and… nothing. Oh, this is disappointing. As it was shipped Sunday, to arrive next day, surely it should have arrived Tuesday.

I feared the worst. I feared YODEL.

But no, JD Sports doesn’t use YODEL. They use Hermes. I know some people have had issues with Hermes but I’ve never had a problem with them. They can always find our address and always turn up when they’re expected to.

Wednesday came… and went. I tweeted at JD Sports and had the usual ‘send a DM’ response. I’d seen this with YODEL a million times before but I gave  them the benefit of the doubt. To be fair, they responded on the Wednesday with the following from ‘Dean’:

Apologies for the delay in getting back to you, It looks like you’ve ordered a personalised top, this means that next day delivery is not available as the item needs to be printed on and the personalisation applied.

This usually adds an additional 24-48 hours before the order is dispatched, as soon as the personalisation is completed, the order will be sent on a next day delivery service and should be with you the following day.

I’ve refunded your next day delivery charge and these funds should be back in your account within 3-5 days, apologies for any inconvenience this delay may cause.

OK, fair enough. There is a note on the website saying next-day isn’t available for shirts which are printed. They still took payment for next-day though, the crafty geezers. However, as the shirt was ‘shipped’ Sunday night (and this is starting to sound unlikely) even if you add on another 24-48hrs it should still have arrived Wednesday.

I asked them about why it was still late and why it said it was shipped when it clearly wasn’t. Dean replied with:

The dispatch email would be because it that group would have been dispatched but because it was personalised, the order would have been removed and taken to be printed.

As this didn’t actually answer my question about why it was still late, I tried again. Dean’s response:

It’s most likely been delayed given the large influx of orders we’ve received, please allow an additional 24 hours and this order should be dispatched.

Another 24hrs went by, and no shirt. I chased them again. It was now Thursday. This time Rosy replied.

Our records show that your order has been despatched and is on its way to you. Your tracking number is 1287573806120172 for you to track your order on Hermes website. Thanks – Rosy

I was getting annoyed now, and I replied to Rosy:

Odd that I’ve had no dispatch email, as promised, apart from the dispatch email Sunday night – which was clearly lying. When was it supposed to have been dispatched?

Now someone called Nick chimes in:

I have looked into this and can see that your order had personalisation on the item. Personalised items can not be allocated for next day delivery due to the time required for personalisation. I can see that my colleague has refunded your delivery charge. Your order should be with you shortly as I can see that it has been despatched. I apologise for any inconvenience this may have caused. Thanks Nick

By which point I’ve lost the plot:

You’re just saying the same thing now. Personalisation should be an extra 24-48hrs, it’s still late. Your colleague said give an additional 24hrs. It’s still late. Then I was given a tracking number. It doesn’t work. This is pathetic.

It’s now Friday, and another JD Sports customer service rep takes over:

I have emailed the warehouse for an update in regards to your order. Once I hear back I will get in touch and advise further. Thanks Pete

I received nothing all day so chased them, before yet another new customer service rep takes over:

Hey Darren, yeah it’s shipped now 🙂 1287573806120172 (Hermes). Cheers, Lewis

I’ve still not had a dispatch email, so chase them about this:

Why the ridiculous delay? Why’ve I had no dispatch email? This is really, really poor.

To which Nick returns. I missed Nick. He was great.

Please accept my apologies regarding no despatch email, Our I.T team will look into this. Thanks Nick

That was the last message I received from them via Twitter, even after I chased them asking for clarification of what the holy hell this following email was about, which I received on the Saturday, 7 days after the initial order… wait for it…

In regards to your order 88542857, I am sorry to inform you that we were unable to print the selected name and number on your football shirt due to lack of customisation letters.

Could you please confirm whether you would like to the keep the item without the personalisation and receive a refund of £12 or to be fully refunded?

Please accept our apologies for the inconvenience caused.

What the  fuck? It hasn’t been shipped? I’ve just been told repeatedly by a veritable hoard of JD Sports idiots that it has been shipped. They given me tracking numbers, and apologies, and bull shit… and they were what… lying?

Just what is going on with JD Sports? Do they have any idea what has happened with the order? Am I just asking the wrong people?

Also, if they haven’t actually printed the name and number on the shirt what have they been doing for the last week?

I replied to the email immediately with:

So why have I been lied to via Twitter, repeatedly, and assured it has been shipped?

Then, before any email response was received, I had a ‘How did we do Darren‘ email from them asking for feedback on how well they had handled my query.

Surely they’re taking the piss now?

They haven’t handled my query at all. It’s been a week, I’ve been told contradictory information and I still do not have what I ordered.

Otherwise yeah, spot on lads. You’ll get my feedback alright, but it won’t be via a survey you can ignore. It will be via a blog, a blog you can’t do a damn thing about. Believe me, many have tried.

It’s not over yet, it gets better – or worse, depending on your viewpoint.

I was called at 12:05 on Monday June 20th by Abdul from JD Sports, from their Manchester office on 0161 767 1499. I can only really describe Abdul as disinterested and rude.

The conversation went around in circles quite a bit as I wanted to know why I had been lied to by their customer service team.

Abdul insisted they didn’t lie, they just didn’t check. He said ‘they didn’t do their job properly’. That’s nice of him to admit. I could have told him that.

“If you’d taken their names, we could have taken it further” he mumbled. To which I told him I had their names as I had a full transcript of the DMs on Twitter. Each one is signed off with a name. I’ve pasted their names above so you can see who said what.

I could sense Abdul couldn’t really care less and wasn’t going to help so I asked if he had a contact for the complaints department. “No, I do not” he mumbled. Well that’s nice isn’t it?

I asked if there was a complaint’s procedure. Yes, he said. The managers can call you back. He then asked for my details. What, like my phone number? The one we’re speaking on now? The one you just used to call me? What other details could you possibly need, my shoe size?

Abdul then offered me a £10 voucher for JD Sports, which I declined as I had no intention of ever using them again.

As it was evident Abdul wasn’t going to be of any help whatsoever, I left the call with him on the understanding the complaints manager would call me back. That was eight days ago. I have not received a call back.

Did I expect one? No, JD Sports clearly has some major customer service issues. The issues being they’re bloody useless and have absolutely no idea what is going on. Rather than help customers with orders they make shit up and lie to stall for time. They actually make things worse.

Meanwhile, however, here is the shirt I ordered without the name and number printed on it.

The more eagle-eyed among you will notice the word ‘Bale’ and the number ’11’ on the shirt. But how, you may ask. Seems JD Sport is so utterly incompetent that their customer service department has made a major issue out of something which didn’t even happen in the first place. Despite the tweets and emails saying it was shipped/not shipped, and it had gone to print/not gone to print, the shirt arrived as ordered – albeit over a week later.

If JD Sport only gave a shit and sorted out its dire customer service it might actually be OK. As it is however I’m never using them again.

Incidentally they did refund me the £12 for the printing. Yes, they’re that useless.

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