In an amazing show of incompetence I thought I’d never see reached by any Government agency, the HM Revenue and Customs have gone and made the CSA and the other morons out there look positively professional.

They’ve managed to lose the details, including names, addresses AND bank details for ALL 25 Million people claiming child benefit in the UK. That’s 25 Million people who’s bank account details are in the hands of shit knows who right now, and I could even be one of them!

How did this major fuck up happen? Simple, some bright twat posted a CD with these details on to another department, and it got, how shall we say, lost. Was it recorded? No, of course not. What was the response when they realised it had gone missing? Why, they went and posted another one!

For fuck’s sake. What a cock sucker.

From the BBC.

In an emergency statement to MPs, Mr Darling apologised for what he described as an “extremely serious failure on the part of HMRC to protect sensitive personal data entrusted to it in breach of its own guidelines”.

MPs gasped as Mr Darling told them: “The missing information contains details of all Child Benefit recipients: records for 25 million individuals and 7.25 million families. “

Unbelievable eh?

It’s hardly surprising though is it? One excuse given today was that too much pressure was put on the already strained HMRC as they’d had job cuts recently. They’ve been asked to perform the impossible, was the bullshit I heard on Radio 5.

Asked to perform the impossible???

“I say, could you try awfully hard NOT to lose the bank account details of 25 Million people?”

…That’s Impossible I say! I’m under too much pressure!!!

Fucking wankers.

Don’t worry mind because the CD, they say, was password protected. I can imagine the level of complexity involved in the choice of password from someone stupid enough to post the bank details of 25 Million people. Let me have 3 guesses now at that password:

1. password
2. childbenefit
3. 123456

That last one is the kind of password an idiot would have on his luggage. If you’ve ‘found’ this CD and are having trouble ‘cracking’ it, try one of those 3 passwords. I’m sure you’ll have success.

Fucking idiots.

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Some time ago I was contacted by a copper about the mysterious disappearance of my ex wife’s father’s chair, from my house. The useless copper insisted he was going to do something about the disappearance of this chair, from my house, despite the fact that it was MY HOUSE and I hadn’t reported anything missing.

Obviously he didn’t actually do anything… shock horror, as we all know the police are utterly useless. But then, what could he do? The chair was dumped in my house… mine!!!

Well, if this photo is anything to go by, the chair has resurfaced, though I’m not sure where. Maybe this is in Cardiff, maybe it’s in Manchester, maybe it’s in Nantes, London, Berlin or Kenya. Who knows where this is, or if indeed it’s THE actual chair. All we know is this: it’s a chair, and it’s NOT in my house.

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There’s nothing like a Rugby World Cup to bring together people from different nationalities in a unified love of, well, getting absolutely twatted in an Irish bar. As this photo demonstrates, I have consumed enough Guinness to win a variety of Guinness merchandise and to pose for a photo with a guy I had never met, nor do I know who he is now.

Obviously we got on in O’Neils, though what we had in common I do not know. Perhaps we were both utterly wankered. That seems a likely scenario.

Rugby, what a game.

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