Category Archives: Internet

PHP and JavaScript code tips website

I recently raged about coding an old ASP website I’d built a while back and how it was it a pain in the ass. I mentioned how now that I’ve discovered PHP my life is no longer filled with unfathomable error messages from Microsoft and gaping wide security holes. ’tis all true.

However even in PHP you need a little help once in a while, which is why this code tips website, talkincode.com, seemingly run by HAL is a great site to add to your bookmarks.

Talk in Code

Featuring advice and code samples for PHP, JavaScript and MySQL this site has answers to questions you’d otherwise spend hours looking for. Sadly there isn’t much in the way of ASP advice on there, but probably the best ASP advice is “don’t”.

What Internet Marketers can learn from George Lucas

George Lucas is a multi billion gazillionaire. He’s made more money from Star Wars than I have Star Wars figures, but then by virtue of the fact that I have a lot of Star Wars figures he’s bound to have a lot of money. That’s economics!

s George Lucas seems to be all about making money, it makes sense that Internet marketers could learn a lot from him, so without further ado…

If you find a niche market, exploit it.

It really doesn’t matter how good you are at something, if you find a niche market that no one else has discovered, exploit the living crap out of it. George Lucas isn’t the best director in the world. His script writing skills are entirely suspect or ‘shit’ as Harrison Ford once labelled them. This didn’t stop George creating one of the biggest franchises in movie history. He found that he could exploit the nerd culture for every penny of their allowance, and he gleefully took it.

This applies to Internet marketing as well. You don’t have to create the best website, or the biggest, or have the most Wookies. You just need to attack the niche with a fervent passion and saturate it. If you own the leading news site, the leading forum and the leading community site all within the same niche, you become the dominant player. As George Lucas has found, this brings very lucrative rewards.

If something works, re-skin it and use it again.

How many costume changes did Natalie Portman have in the Star Wars prequels? I’ll tell you, it was 7,963*. The reason for this was that George Lucas could then sell 7,963 different Amidala Star Wars figures. She’s the same figure, but with a different costume; and the nerds bought them. This couldn’t be truer of Internet marketing. If you create a site that works and earns you money simply copy the site, re-colour it, re-package it and use it for another site.

Repeat the process ad infinitum and then in a few years you might have as many websites earning you money as I have useless Amidala figures, all running off the same template.

Know when to delegate

Even a megalomaniac control freak like George Lucas knows he can’t do everything, so should you. If ideas are your forte and your time is best spent thinking, pondering and coming up with obnoxious CGI characters then that is how you should spend all of your time. If you need someone to write the code or design the site for you, hire a freelancer. Prices are cheap and money spent at this stage can be recouped easily on the time saved and the fact that you’ve had something done correctly by a skilled professional.

George Lucas tried to re-edit Empire Strikes Back when he thought that Irvin Kershner was ruining his film with all that ‘love’ crap between Han and Leia. Thankfully for all of us George quickly realised that Kersh was in fact correct and he let him finish the film his way.

See the bigger picture

I constantly get people wondering what it is I actually do, and how I make money. It’s not obvious to the average 9-5 guy. When George Lucas made Star Wars he waived his director’s fee in exchange for merchandising rights to the film. People at the time wondered how he was going to make any money from the project, now he has enough money to buy a small island, Australia perhaps. George had faith in his idea and knew it would work. He could see the bigger picture, something many people can’t.

To succeed in Internet marketing, particularly affiliate marketing you need to be able to look beyond the wage-slave existence that most people experience. Being paid a flat rate fee for a set amount of hours didn’t interest George, and it shouldn’t interest you.

Don’t be precious about your website

In ‘Return of the Jedi’ the battle on Endor between the Ewoks and the Storm Troopers was originally supposed to feature Wookies. I know, Wookies don’t live on Endor, but they nearly did. George changed the battle to Ewoks because he thought fluffy cuddly teddy bears would be more merchandisable. When everyone else told George that 3 foot teddy bears fighting Storm Troopers was ridiculous, he said “No… I’m going to make more money this way”. By Christ he was right.

The moral here is that you shouldn’t be afraid to make changes to your website that, although may appear to be at the detriment of the website, in fact make more money. George Lucas’ goal wasn’t to make a compelling film; it was to make a mountain of cash. He did this spectacularly well because he never lost sight of his goal. Always remember why you’re in Internet marketing.

* The figure of 7,963 was made up. I’m not certain Natalie Portman had this many costume changes during the Star Wars prequels as I fell asleep during the Phantom Menace and woke up around the time R2D2 was flying in Attack of the Clones. I presume the figure is fairly accurate however based on the crap that filled the shelves in Wal-Mart shortly after.

I hate ASP

For years I’d been coding in ASP and have only in the last few months switched to the more reliable, stable and easier PHP. Well, I knew my Microsoft sabbatical would come back to bite me on the ass. I’m trying to edit an old site built in ASP and it’s proving to be a serious pain in the ass. I’m looking at the code and wondering what the hell it’s supposed to be doing. I should know, I wrote it, yet I don’t.

I haven’t a frickin’ clue. It may as well be written in German for all I can work out.

I hate it, it’s a nonsensical language from a demon spawn source. Never again will I use it, I swear.

WordPress upgrade again

The guys at WordPress have just released a new version, 2.3.2 which promises to fix a few important security bugs. They recommend you upgrade immediately, as I have done with this blog.

WordPress 2.3.2 is an urgent security release that fixes a bug that can be used to expose your draft posts. 2.3.2 also suppresses some error messages that can give away information about your database table structure and limits and stops some information leaks in the XML-RPC and APP implementations.

Visits from France

This might be interesting to some people, well to one more likely. The last week I’ve had numerous visits from the City of Nantes, in France, as the Analytics screenshot below will show.

Nantes

(Click for a larger version)

I find this odd because the person in question (as you can see by the 0% new visitors it IS one person) has recently removed me from Facebook, MSN and generally cut all contact with me, yet they seem intent on checking this site to see what I might be up to.

Well, as you can see I know you’ve been looking at the website, perhaps you’d like to get in touch? Maybe even explain why you’ve blocked all contact with me? I’m guessing you won’t, so as you don’t seem to want to speak to me again, just check up on me via this website, have a happy Christmas x.

MSN ranks me #1 for ‘Transformers the Movie’

Here’s an interesting thing, an SEO related post from me. I know, this blog is supposed to be about SEO yet I rarely mention it. Well, now I am. Shut up and listen.

The random website generator known as MSN always seemed to ignore my Transformers related websites, despite excellent rankings on Yahoo! and Google. It’s as if MSN had some odd, random element to its algorithm. You don’t say!

Anyhow, I recently moved the Transformers The Movie website I own to a new host and converted it to WordPress, and would you credit it but MSN suddenly found it? Not only found it, but whacked it at #1 for ‘Transformers the Movie‘. Just for the record it’s also #1 in Live.com’s variation.

Now is this because I’ve moved to a UK based host, or is it the more indexable (nice word that) WordPress that’s done the trick?

To be honest whatever the reason, if being #1 in MSN for a result was worth two shits I’d be really excited. As it is it’s worth sod all, while I’m glad MSN has discovered my website I wish the general Internet using public would discover MSN.

This site may harm your computer

My DVD Reviews website, WhatDVD.Net was hacked today, again. This is becoming a habit, and mostly down to the fact that it’s a bloody Windows hosted website. Anyway, that’ll change soon enough, but the fact remains it was hacked and once again I had to restore the database from a back-up.

Problem is, due to the fact that WhatDVD.Net is so successful in Google (Page 1 for ‘DVD Reviews‘) it gets indexed several times a day, and was indexed with the hack in place. Google has read the code on the site and flagged it up as potentially unsafe.

DVD Reviews

The message it flags up is ‘This site may harm your computer’… nice eh? My readers will love that. Considering the traffic WhatDVD.Net gets from Google this is causing quite an effect.

When you try to click through to the site you get this message.

May Harm small

Luckily you can request Google re-evaluates the website through Webmaster tools, but what a load of messing around because of some cock hacking the site. What did it achieve?

Tossers.