Category Archives: Rants

Rants

What chance do children have?

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I was just in Asda (I know, if you go to Asda you’ve gotta expect to see scum) and I was stood in the queue next to a couple with two young boys. I do fear sometimes that some children don’t have a chance in life. The total of their shopping consisted of the following:

  • 2 bags of doughnuts
  • 1 crate of cheap lager
  • 2 cans of Asda’s own brand of Red Bull

That was it. Clearly that was the tea for the evening for the mum, the dad and the two kids. I you’d seen the utter uselessnes of the father you’d realise the dispair I’m feeling right now.

Where are social services when they should be doing something?

Rants

Paedophile of pop gets payout from Packard

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You’d think that abusing children would spark an end to your career, especially when you’d been found guilty and sent to prison in Vietnam for it. No so though for Garry Glitter, as he’s getting £100,000 from Hewlett Packard for using his song ‘Do You Wanna Touch Me’ in a TV advert for one of their new ‘touch screen’ models.

How thick do you have to be to use something from Garry Glitter for a TV ad? His very name is cockney rhyming slang, surely anyone who’s ever watched the news will know to stay clear of him?

Not Hewlett Packard though. They’re forking out £100,000 to be associated with a child molester who sexually assaulted two children, aged nine and eleven.

What tossholes.

What next for Glitter? Will he get a spot hosting Blue Peter?

Internet, Rants

Facebook backlash over redesign, millions of chavs set to fuck off back to MySpace

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Regular users of Facebook will have noticed that the website introduced a new design a few months ago, but gave the option to revert back to the old one. Naturally, as many people dislike, and in many cases, fear change, quite a few people did revert back to the old one.

However, the new design is now compulsory, and it’s caused those people who prefer the old one to complain. There have been Facebook groups, complaints and even threats of leaving the website, all from these people who dislike the new design.

Now, I can’t keep calling them ‘these people’… I’ll need something more descriptive, more accurate. I know, tossholes.

Tossholes such as these:

“This layout is garbage,” writes Andrew Wadup. “Why fix what ain’t broken? Keep the old version,” pleads Eddie Santos.

Those were comments left on the notice board on the site.

Facebook meanwhile stated about their new design:

We set out to make Facebook simpler, cleaner, more relevant, and easier to control. With your feedback and participation, we believe we’ve gotten to the best Facebook yet.

The new design is different, and we understand that some people will be uncomfortable with the changes. But over time, we think people will appreciate the advantages of the new design and the new features it offers.

You see, Facebook redesigned to stop all of the crap that idiots add to their profile pages appearing whenever you click on their profile. I for one was fed up of clicking on the profile of someone who came from MySpace (you know the sort of person I mean) and they had twenty million applications added to their page, which meant the page took eight years to load. Shit like the vampires app, the pirates app, the superwall, funwall, superpoke and other such crap that idiots felt they needed to add. All of it garbage.

Well, the new Facebook hides that shit away in tabs, so the MySpace crowd can be as dumb as they like and add as much shit as they like without bothering the rest of us. Now the MySpace crowd are complaining, and are even threatening to leave Facebook.

Good, fuck off back to MySpace you chav scum shitbags, take your shitty applications with you.

This is what happens you when let anyone join, I say keep Facebook elite and demand at least a university degree before people sign up.

Rants, Star Wars

Want a Nintendo Wii? Become a child murderer!

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In ten days the Star Wars game comes out on the Wii, and I’ve been planning on getting one just for that game. Thing is, the Wii is £179, which isn’t cheap. I’d quite like one for free.

Wouldn’t we all?

Of course getting a Nintendo Wii for free isn’t really going to happen, unless I murder two ten year old girls. Yes, that would do it.

No, I haven’t got mad… but I am pretty mad, there is a difference. You see, the Soham murderer Ian Huntley, who tortured and killed the two ten year old girls Holly Wells and Jessica Chapman, has a Nintendo Wii, and he had one for free.

Worse yet, the taxpayer, me, paid for it!

It seems that the murdering scumbag was given a Wii by the government to stop him going through with his threats to commit suicide. Call me heartless, but so what if does? Does the world really need to keep a child killer alive and entertained in the lap of luxury?

A spokesman for the prison service stated:

Huntley has been asking for a Wii for months.

When he moved to Frankland in February he was given a Nintendo Game Cube – but after only a few weeks he began complaing it was out of date.

Management are desperate to stop him going though with threats he’s made to kill himself and by giving him a Wii they believe they can take his mind away from harming himself in any way.

Many of them don’t want to get involved with him because of his crimes.

But they know it’s more than their jobs are worth if they don’t comply.

I can’t imagine why nobody wants to get to know him, he seems like such a nice chap!

He has almost everything done for him and is waited on hand and foot by the officers assigned to his care.

He lives in luxury – yet the parents of Holly and Jessica are living a nightmare.

How sick is this world? Kill two young girls and get a free Wii.

Rants

Hoax phone calls

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I received two calls last night from an ‘unknown number’ and when I answered they hung up both times. This is fairly common for me, as being the person that I am and running the websites that I do I make a lot of enemies.

Naturally when I received TWO calls from an unknown number and they both hung up my ‘digital ears’ started to burn. This always means that somewhere, on a forum, there is a discussion going on among idiots about how I’ve somehow insulted them and how they’ll get me back by crank calling me. They’ll have posted my contact details from the Whois on one of my sites and will think it’s hilarious that they’re phoning me and hanging up.

So, whoever you are this time, don’t hang up. You have my number, grow some testicles and say something on the phone. Better yet, don’t withold your number. Let’s have a chat and see what intelligent comments you’ve got to share. You might even make one of my famed podcasts.

Rants

Microsoft Word pisses me off on a daily basis

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In my work I have the misfortune to use Microsoft Word on a daily basis, it’s unavoidable. Why is this so bad? Because Word is the Devil’s program designed by Satan himself.

For example, when writing or editing a document and the language is set English US (as seems to be default no matter how many times you change it) it rightly flags up English spellings of words as being incorrect. Words such as “Customise” and “Optimise” in their English UK spellings are underlined in red.

That’s all fine, had I wanted to write in the illiterate Yankee language, that would be indeed wrong. However when you change the language to the correct English UK you would expect the American spellings, with the letter ‘Z’, to be flagged up as being wrong.

You’d be wrong.

Microsoft Word, in its infinite wisdom, says the spelling with a ‘Z’ or an ‘S’ is fine. It lets the Yank spelling through. Why? Because it’s a twat that’s why. You then have to read through each word very carefully to check that the spelling is correct, because Word is a lying bastard.

Get Bill Gates in here!

Rants

A Tax for the unemployed on using the Post Office

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Today I went to the Post Office to change back the money I had left over from Dublin, which was a surprise that I had any at all, but I guess my liver said enough was enough at some point. Anyway, I digress. I went into the Post Office during my lunch hour only to find myself in a queue behind the usual array old people and unemployed, all dawdling along in their own sweet time.

This meant I wasted around 20 minutes of my lunch hour waiting in a queue, for people who could have gone at any point that day as they clearly had sod all else to do.

It’s annoying. So annoying fact that I propose a tax on the unemployed and retired (jobless basically) that states they can only enter a Post Office between the hours of 12 and 2 if they pay a £20 ‘jobless’ tax. This should ensure the scroungers of the world are kept out of my way during the day.

They don’t need to be in there at that time, they can do it earlier or later. Just not when I’m there.

I’d also like to see a maximum service time for Post Offices. When you’re buying stamps to post a letter to your daughter who lives in Australia (who’s clearly moved just to get away from you) you don’t need 15 minutes window time to do it. 2 minutes should suffice. Don’t stop to chat about the weather (it’s raining, obviously), don’t talk about your daughter who you never see and no one wants to hear about your cat. Just buy your stamps and get the hell out of the way.

What do you reckon? Could my £20 jobless tax for using the Post Office at lunch hours work? Prove you’re employed, pay the tax or come back later… spongers.

CSA, Rants

Carphone Warehouse manager proves what a moron he is

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This week I had an email from a former Carphone Warehouse manager who wanted to swear at me and insult me, because that’s what Carphone Warehouse staff are like. His badly written comments came after a post I made about the Child Support Agency, and a post where I made a Carphone Warehouse complaint.

Let’s have a look at what he says:

on reading and listening to your phone calls i wish to make one very large point, IF YOU HAD COME TO AN AGREEMENT WITH YOUR EX WIFE TO PAY FOR YOUR CHILDREN then you would have no need for the (as you put it incompetent CSA).

OK, thanks for the comments Dan, but alas whether I had come to agreement with my ex-wife or not, the CSA would still have been involved. They get involved as soon as the parent with care signs on for benefit. If you’re going to email someone and spout off with a torrent of foul language, look up your facts first so you don’t come across like an utter prick.

I also happened to have 2 members of my family that work for the CSA and hear about scum like your self using every which way he can not to pay everyday. so what you have to pay the mortgage thats a a privalage not a right. if you cant afford it sell your house.

You have two family members who work for the CSA, and you’re proud of that? I’d sooner admit to being related to Hitler than know anyone who works at the CSA. If I can’t afford to pay my mortgage I should sell my house eh? Well my stupid friend, I could quit my job and have people who work support me, then my mortgage would be paid for me by them. Perhaps I should do that and become sponging, workshy scum?

i also happend to be a branch manager at carphone warehouse. and frankly if you and your now EX wife where to stupid to know you get a free upgrade at the end of your contract then its your own fault. and just to add to your coments of cpw, it is in know way true that we offer any sort of 14 day money back garentee. surly a man of your so called knowledge and expertese on what is right and fair is capable of making his mind up on a mobile phone handset after deliberating for over half an hour ! in store.

Ah, so you worked for Carphone Warehouse? That makes sense. Now I see why you’re so illiterate, you were a branch manager for Carphone Warehouse. I’m sorry to shatter your world but not everyone gives a toss what phone they have, or cares about ‘upgrades’ and ‘contracts’ for their mobile. I realise your little insignificant world revolves around mobile phones, so well done, you stay there and try not communicate with the rest of us as clearly your efforts to do so sound you out as a complete imbecile.

I do beleave not only are you trying to make a quick buck from posting your perthetic stories on the net that really its your incompatence that has caused you all this hassel. not only can you not keep a wife, but now you have a second marrige with a further 2 kids. maybe uf you keep it in your trousers you could afford repayments, fact is your a failure and your scared to admit it.

I have a second marriage with another two kids? When did that happen? If I were you I’d stop sniffing the glue that holds your mittens onto your sleeves and carry on staring at the wall for the rest of the day. Someone who ‘used’ to be a branch manager for Carphone Warehouse really shouldn’t throw around words like ‘failure’ when describing others.